Tuesday Night Visit:

I only had Lizzy last night.  Nathan had a track meet.
We went to Rolla to have more pictures printed.  Liz is not shy or backward at all.  We needed help and away she went to get someone to help "as that was their job".  And I actually loaded pictures from my camera all by myself!!  I was so proud!  Guess it's not that big a deal as people do it all the time but I don't like trying new things, especially in front of other people.
Liz's highlight of shopping was she found me my favorite Scentsy scent, Honeysuckle.  I love the smell.  And speaking of trying new things, she had me go through the self-check out.  I told her that was dumb but she insisted, said she loved the self checkout.  She ran everything through but then we had to wait on a clerk as I was writing a check.  Would have been just as fast as waiting a couple minutes in line on regular checkout.  I know I won't be doing self-check out again.  Dumb!!  I don't go to the store to have to be a cashier along with shopping.
I had the best evening; Dwayne found my missing wedding rings!!  I had lost them several months ago.  I not only hated losing them as I love the set, but they were my mother-in-laws and they meant a lot to me.  They were in a cup on a shelf in the kitchen.  Too tall for me to look in.  Dwayne had set them in there last Fall when I had a doctor's apt. in St. Louis and needed to remove my jewelry.  I guess I handed them to Dwayne and that's where they ended up.
Susan cleans for me and I was telling her today I had found my wedding rings.  She goes, "in the cup".  If only I had mentioned to her I lost my wedding rings it would have saved me a lot of anguish.
I love these nights with Lizzy aka The Ear.  She is such a little character, she sees and knows everything.  Never a dull moment with her.

I am grateful I now have my wedding rings back on my finger where they belong.

Addition:

Lizzy's pictures of meeting President Obama in Ft. Hood, Texas at her step-dad's funeral.

Busy Weekend:

Friday:
I stayed home as I wasn't feeling well.  By later afternoon, I felt well enough to run into Rolla.  I went to J.C. Penney's and boy did I hit the jackpot!!  They had little boy shirts for only 2.97, jeans and shorts marked down real cheap.  I bought LOTS of shirts for Desmon along with a couple pairs of jeans and I think three pairs of shorts.  Stopped at PayLess and got both Cash and Desmon a pair of shoes real cheap.  Went home and put groceries away then headed to Chad's.  I thought Desmon would be real excited but he was in one of his moods of being extra quiet and sad.  (His Mom had promised to come see him during the week and hadn't shown up by Friday).  We tried to tease him out of his mood but that didn't help.  I finally talked him into going up to Aunt Judy's with me as her grandson, Gunner, was down to visit.  That got him in a good mood.  He then got to go out to eat with Tony and the rest of the kids and wound up spending the night with Gunner.  Poor little guy, he has so many emotions running through his head.  (along with disappointments)
Saturday:
I started Spring cleaning my living room.  Man, it's harder than it used to be!! lol  Shampooed the furniture and carpet.  Looked pretty good when I got done but I no where near got everything cleaned and put away.  My kitchen is now overloaded with stuff that either needs to be thrown away or cleaned and put back in the living room.
My great niece, Ashlyne was going to be a Princess candidate at the Prom and we were going to go over and watch the kids go in.  We met April and Cash at Devlin's Cafe for supper and then on to school.  I was surprised by the amount of parents already there.  We had a good time visiting and watching all the girls coming in with such stunning dresses.  My favorite was of a vivid yellow dress; can't really describe the hue but it was beautiful.  

Ashlyne and Baby Cash; his 1st Prom

Josh Falter and Ashlyne Paige Rowe

 

We went home and then Judy and I were going back over at ten to watching the crowning.

Judy, Zach and Gunner came over a little before ten.  Gunner decided he was going to stay and have some "guy hanging out time" with Uncle Dwayne.  lol

We went in at ten but to our embarrassment, we got run out.  Parents weren't supposed to get there until ten-thirty.  Even at age 57, it's embarrassing when the principal gets on to you...

Prince Candidate:  Seth John

Princess Candidate:  Ashlyne Rowe

Ashlyne didn't win but she had a great time and did a great job of decorating for the Prom.  She was in charge of decorations.

When we got home, Gunner was something else.  He's such a funny little kid.  Enjoyed getting to see him.

Sunday:

I was getting ready to go to church and Chad called just to visit.  We talked for forty-five minutes.  Probably more than if he would have came over for a visit.  Life is going so much better for Chad right now and that makes me happy.  If anything bad is going to happen, it always seems to be to Chad.  Love that boy!

I went to church and then to the Dollar General to buy a picture frame.  You can't find oak ones anymore, had to settle for a different style.  Darn!!

Went home and tried to print off the reports for the Davis Cemetery meeting at two.  I just bought brand new ink and it wouldn't work.  Piddled around the house for awhile and didn't notice the time and had to rush around.  Meeting went good, there is usually a couple people that bring up stuff that doesn't need to be, but overall it was a good meeting.

Then off  to Mom's to pick up her gift to take to my cousin's baby shower.  Luckily, Becky just lives across the road so I didn't have far to go.  I love baby and bridal showers.  I always have such a good time and this was no exception.  Got to visit with a lot of relatives and of course, the good food.

Went home and took a nap.  Not sure if that was a good idea or not as I woke up feeling awful.  I can see why babies sometimes wake up in a bad mood.

Dwayne and I watched TV and called it a night.

 

I am grateful to have so many family member and being able to enjoy their company.

Spring:

Spring is finally here; it shows in the beautiful redbud trees and phlox. 

 

 

I am grateful for the different seasons of the year but Spring is my favorite by far.

 

Tuesday night visit:

Nathan and Lizzy (Great nephew & niece) come over every Tuesday night to visit and watch TV.  Liz and I watch Teen Mom and Nathan goes to the basement to watch TV.  The rules are for them to arrive at 6:30, so Dwayne and I have a chance to eat supper first.
I was a little surprised when I got home and found Judy (my sister, their grandma), Nathan and Liz on the front porch.  Judy said hi and said the kids said it was okay with Aunt Connie for them to be there at 5:30.  Huh?  I hadn't even talked to the kids.  I didn't make a big deal about it.  I just kind of rolled my eyes and said to Judy they know the rules of what time they're supposed to be here.  She goes, "I should have called you to check".  I said, no they're okay.  Little did I know until around 7:30 they were spending the night too............  Those little stinkers!!  lol  Which also meant I would have to go in a little early to work as I would be taking them to school.  Oh, well.
Lizzy went over to the neighbors to visit a friend, Dwayne was cutting fence posts and Nathan and I didn't have anything to do.  I suggested cards but he didn't want to do that.  Then he says, "hey, we  could go to Dairy Queen".  I said, "okay, let's go".  He was like,  "I was just joking but are you really taking me to Dairy Queen for ice cream"?  He was shocked, but I figured I needed to give him some one on one time as it's usually just me and Lizzy doing things.  It was a nice drive and he talked about his feelings about his step-dad's dying and a few other things on his mind.  When we got into Rolla, he asks me if I like the Dodge Nitro's.  I'm like, "I'm not really into sports".  He said, "WHAT"?  I said, "I really don't like sports at all".  He started laughing and said, "Aunt Connie, Dodge Nitro is a car"!  I really lost it then and we had a good laugh.  I thought it was a sports team.  You know, like Dallas Cowboys or St. Louis Cardinals.  Lol
Lizzy came home and then started working on a science project.  (Great, I just had Susan clean the house yesterday).  She was using tissue paper and gluing onto cardboard.  She cleaned up her mess but you know kids, I now have little pieces of tissue paper on the counter top and under the bar stools.
Darn!!  If only they had come the night before Susan cleaned.  Lol
Liz and I got fooled as Dwayne wanted the TV so we had to wait until he went to bed to watch our show.
Overall, we had a nice evening.  These kids wanting to come visit us "old" people means a lot to me.
I hope they retain these memories into their adulthood.  But they will be like the older kids, outgrow us with time.

I am grateful for these two and the joy of them thinking I'm not Great Aunt Connie but a special aunt.

Three Day Weekend:

Friday:
I had the day off and enjoyed it thoroughly.  I lazed around in my Jammie's and drank coffee and watched three episodes of Grey's Anatomy.  Did a few things around the house but mainly just relaxed.
Then I had to make the dreaded trip to Wal-Mart's for groceries and items for the Sunday Easter Dinner.
That evening, I took a walk up the drive to where Dwayne was clearing out the neighbor's fence row and we rent his pasture for the cows.  Dwayne threw me for a total loop, he asked what I thought about selling our house and buying Lou's and then we would be out of debt.  I'm like, huh, what?  Are you crazy?  It really tore at me as I could see Dwayne wanted to do it.  I do love the location; I have always wanted to live closer to the road, BUT we built our house from the ground up-no contractors, just us and friends.  It's home.  Dwayne asked me to at least look at it.  I did and it was a nice house in the seventies but this is 2014 and wood paneling is out of style, not to mention making a room look darker.  The kitchen is a total rip out.  We would have to spend a ton of money on it.  He asked me to at least think about it.  And I did, as in dreaming about it all night.
Saturday:
Dwayne's first words to me were, well you've had time to think about it, what do you say?  Uh, no, I just can't do it.  I know he was disappointed, but I just can't leave my house and live through a remodel.  Dwayne meets  himself coming and going now as it is.  And we don't do contractors, we have to do everything ourselves. Also, I just couldn't see selling and someone else living in MY (our) house.  Ugh!
I had a great birthday.  I went to April's and picked up and Cash and we went to the lake shopping all day.  Cash did great and loved looking at everything in the stores.  His little head was constantly looking back and forth. 
That evening, we went to a friend's house for mine and her birthday.  We had a wonderful time, the best time I've had in a long time.
Sunday:
Got up and started getting ready for Easter Dinner.  Dwayne was in charge of the hams.  We had a good turnout but only two kids and one baby for the Easter Egg Hunt.  Several had other Easter events to attend and couldn't make it this year.
Mom looked really good as she has not been feeling well for awhile.  A good friend and neighbor came for the afternoon.  It was so good to see her getting out of the house.  We had a good afternoon visiting and of course eating.
Lizzy stayed for the afternoon.  We started watching Teen Mom and I fell asleep so I went in and took a nap.  Felt much better after that.  Cleaned the kitchen and floor up then we watched a movie.
A wonderful day.

I am grateful for my family and being the hostess for the 25th year in a row of Elrod/Feeler a
Annual Easter Dinner.

I am grateful

Todd's Birthday:

Todd Christopher:

My baby boy turned 33today.  Where did the time go?

(love his crooked smile)

Todd was born on Good Friday in 1981 and we went home from the hospital on Easter Sunday, the 19th and my birthday. I was also born on Good Friday in 1957.
My due date for Todd was April 4th and that was my Grandma's birthday. Since I had Chad on his due date, I smugly thought I would have a baby girl on my Grandma's birthday, the 4th. I had planned so well..... lol
God had other plans. A baby boy born two weeks late. We joke that Todd is such a sleepy head, it was natural he didn't wake up until two weeks after he was to make his appearance. At the time, (and it's no secret to Todd) I was a little disappointed not to have a girl. I looked over at the screaming red headed infant and thought, a boy, a red headed boy? Chad was born nice and clean and quiet, not Toddy, he came out screaming. I was glad when they brought him to me after he was cleaned up to see his hair was not red but almost black. BACK THEN, you didn't get to hold your baby until the body temperature was back to normal.
Trust God!! That is what I should have done. No one could have prepared me for the funny little character he blessed us with. Todd was (and is) like no other. He was such a little comedian and he wanted to grow up and be Johnny Carson. There are so many funny Todd stories, I wouldn't know where to begin.
We took the boys to the Smokey Mountains the summer Todd turned two in April. He was such a talker. We did not see any bears but a stuffed one at a souvenir shop that Chad and Todd sat on for a picture. On the way home, we stopped at Dwayne's Aunt Rita's in Illinois. The boys had been asleep in the truck and Todd came fully awake once we got in the house. He began telling Aunt Rita stories about the trip and how he saw a bear and fought with it and on and on. That was the beginning of "Todd's stories" for years to come.
In December of that same year, I saw some people in town that came to the doctor's office where I worked. Todd proceeded to tell them I was having a baby girl on April 4th of the next year. They congratulated me and I don't know where he came up with that as I was not pregnant. He also told them Dwayne, Chad and my full name and birth dates, along with the years we were born.
In hindsight, thank goodness our ways are not God's ways and he knows better than us. What a joy Todd has brought to our lives and everyone around him.
Thank you God for the birth of our second son.

I am grateful for my son, Todd.

Weekly Visit:

I just can't get my eyes open

Got one barely open

Okay, now I've got both eyes open.  I was just tricking you guys........

  Sure am grateful for this little light in our life.

Busy Weekend:

Friday:

Dwayne and I went to Rolla shopping.  I really love baby shoes and Cash has outgrown all of his.  We went all over town and couldn't find anything.  Finally found a pair of sandals at PayLess.

I couldn't figure out why my grocery bill could be as high as it was.  Forgot Dwayne bought two batteries for his tractors-oh, that's why it was over $200 higher than normal.  Ugh!

Saturday:

A great day at home.  Did a few odd jobs around the house.  I don't know how I could stuff so much in one closet!

Washed the porch off and cleaned out the flower bed by the road and put down new mulch.

Then I went up to see Mom and Dad for awhile.  They had a good day being outside on the porch.

Went home to take a shower and then Zach came over to spend the night.  Dwayne was over at Vichy cleaning around the lake so we drove over there.  Got there and no Dwayne.  Called him and he was eating a cheeseburger at Sput's.  Good deal, me and Zach joined him and then I didn't have to cook supper.

They went on home in Dwayne's truck and I went to Mike and Susan's to see their kitchen.  Susan and painted and put tile up around her cabinets.  She's is so good at doing things like that.  The tile just matched all of her Southwestern decorations.

Dwayne went to Masonic Lodge and I could tell Zach was getting a little bored.  So we went in to Rolla and got a milkshake at Dairy Queen.  Zach drove.  Imagine a fifteen year old that doesn't like  to drive!  lol  We then went by my niece Kristin's to see her and her two boys, Kaden and Kaleb.  I always love it when I visit as Kaden gets so excited and yells, "Aunt Connie, I've missed you!!" and runs and gives me a big hug.  Kaleb says, "and me".  His favorite thing to say after anything Kaden does.  Before you think Kaden thinks I'm special, he does that to everyone that visits.  His excitement is just so cute.

We came home and watched Titanic.  I had never seen it before.

Sunday:

I went to church and Dwayne and Zach started cleaning the yard.  So many limbs and leaves everywhere.

We had a barbecue that evening for all the April birthdays.  Todd barbecued pork steaks and several of our friends came over.  We had a good time visiting.

Bless Dwayne; he cleaned the kitchen up after everyone left.  I've kind of been having a flare-up with my lupus and have been extremely exhausted.  He helps me so much in the kitchen anymore, almost nightly.  I think he's a keeper.  lol

 

I am grateful for my family and friends and especially for my husband.

Weekly Visit:

Cash and Grandma

 

Our visit didn't go as planned.  Grandpa Dwayne was sick with the flu and had to stay home.

Could be the reason Cash was so happy with Grandma last night.  lol  He is definitely a Grandpa's boy.

Cash is quite the little boy.  I took him outside and he loved watching the cars go by.  His little head would just go back and forth watching.

 

I am so grateful for these weekly visits.

Desmon's Birthday:

It's hard to believe that this little boy who has come into our lives turned nine years old yesterday.
I went down to Chad's for cake last night and to take Des his present.  I had given him a small diesel truck that had pictures of bears, etc and Alaska painted on the trailer, plus five gold dollars.  I don't know which he was more excited for.  When he opened the gold dollars he told Todd he had finally made a discovery.  lol 
It's so good to see him so happy and content.  He was such an angry and hurt little boy for a few months with his Mom coming back into his life.  It's good she's back around him as he needs her, but he spent so much time worrying about her, if she was going to come home at night, etc.  Now that he is settled back in full time at Chad's, he's like a changed little boy.
I am very proud of Chad for taking in a little boy that isn't even his or the boys mother ever his girlfriend; just a neighbor in need.  Chad has a big heart and he clearly loves Desmon.
I had so planned on taking pictures of Desmon and his cake but totally forgot.  Pictures showing happy memories would mean a lot to him. I'll get him this weekend at our April Birthday's Barbecue.

I am grateful for this little boy whom we all love and welcome into our family.

Busy Weekend:

Friday:

I was so tired Friday and was looking forward to a relaxing evening at home.  Well, that didn't happen.  lol

Lizzy and Nathan's step-dad, Timothy Owens was one of the soldiers killed at Ft. Hood, TX last week.  Lizzy needed a funeral dress as the funeral will be in Ft. Hood and there is a possibility they will meet the President.  We shopped at Kohl's and found a really cute dress and an outfit for the trip. We then went to Penney's and she found another dress as they will have more than one occasion to attend.  Do you know how hard it is to find an appropriate black dress for a pre-teen?  We had to finish off our shopping by going to Dairy Queen for a milk shake.  Shopping is hard work!!

We finished the evening by Lizzy modeling her clothes for Uncle Dwayne (who thought she looked entirely too grown up in them...)  We watched "our" shows on TV and I fell asleep in the chair long before the shows got over.

Saturday:

We slept late and lazed around all morning.  Lizzy accidentally got the wrong size of cami at Penney's so we needed to make another trip into Rolla.  Can't have too much shopping.  lol

Went to several stores and then ate lunch at Arby's. We went to my friends, Mike and Susan's house but I forgot they had went to Kansas City for their daughter, Carrie's birthday.  I showed Lizzy their yard and how pretty it is.  Mike made a zip line for their grand kids but I was afraid for us to use it in case we broke something.  Looked fun though.

We were both tired when we got home so both of us took a nap.  Much needed for me, I slept along time.  I woke up to the sound of Zach's dirt bike.  Went outside and Lizzy was on the 4 wheeler.  Mom and Dad were at the end of the road talking to Dwayne where he was cleaning a fence row out.  Lizzy took me for a ride up to where they were.  What fun!  The kids rode for awhile and then time for a lazy Mom supper of frozen pizzas and hot dogs.  Tony and Nathan came over later to pick Lizzy up and Zach spent the night.  Nathan showed me all the clothes he got for the trip.  Lizzy asked if it was okay to be excited about riding in a limo and meeting the President.  I told her it's okay to joy amongst the sorrow.  I think Lizzy will do okay with the trip and funeral, but I still worry about her as she holds things in.  Nathan is not doing very well dealing with Tim's death and all that they're going through.  I think after he sees his Mom, he will do better.  Will be a very stressful week for them.

Sunday:

I went to church and we had a great sermon.  Afterwards, I went to Mom and Dad's.  We've all been so cooped up this winter due to the weather.  I asked Mom if she wanted to go on a ride and she said yes, to Meramac Springs.

Iron Mine

Momma

Mom looks really good in this picture.

She's had a rough winter, health wise.

Dad

Mom and Dad reminisced a lot about our years making molasses at Old Iron Works Days at Meramac Springs.  We had some good memories.

 

We then went to visit my cousin, John Williams and his wife Charlotte.  John has been very sick and in and out of the hospital.  Dad asked if I knew how to get there.  I said, "just hide and watch".  Well, the joke was on me; I took the wrong route.  Rosati is just outside of St. James on the service road.  I forgot and took the interstate and had to backtrack.  Never brag on yourself!!  It backfires!!

I went home and took another nap.  I needed it as I've been so exhausted.  Sure don't need another relapse.  Hard to take it easy sometimes when you're used to being on the go all the time.

 

Had a great weekend of visiting family.  I am grateful for these times.

 

 

Weekly Visit:

Our weekly visit turned out a little scary on the drive to St. Elizabeth.  There was quite a thunderstorm and on Hwy 133 a tree was down over the electric line.  Luckily, we were able to go thru as one lane was still (partially) open.  The poor truckers were going to have a long wait until the electric company got there and take care of it.  April texted saying they were under tornado warning and her and Cash were in the basement.  Everyone was to take shelter.  By the time we got there, the storm was rolling on to the east.

 

Cash loves looking at himself in the mirror.

Our weekly photo.

 

Someday, I plan on lining up the photos and seeing how much he's changed from week to week.

 

I am so grateful for this little guy that has come into our life.

My Grandma:

April 4th is my Grandma Feeler's birthday.  Naturally, I miss her as we all do on our loved ones that are gone.  Grandma treated all of her grandkids as if they were special.  My middle name is the same as Grandma's and I cherish that.

Me-Connie Rebecca, Dad holding Chad and my Grandma-Eliza Rebecca

 

I am grateful to have known the love of my Grandma.

Grief:

I had planned on posting about the rest of my trip on Monday, but it was a busy day at work.
Then news hit that a young man the boys went to school with killed himself (and rode the bus with).
Then yesterday my great nephew, Nathan and great niece, Lizzy's stepdad was one of the soldier's killed at Fort Hood, TX.  I hurt so bad for them.  Nathan is taking it pretty hard and Lizzy says she's just fine, but I know it's really affecting her, too.  She just holds things in.
I know death is a part of life, but I'm having a hard time dealing with so many deaths in just the last couple months.  I know I shouldn't fixate on death, but it seems as if it clouds my thoughts more than it should.  I'm reading a book on faith and dealing with grief, so hopefully I will get this worked out in my head.
Are others of you going through this same thing?  I used to deal with death easier, even with the tragic murder of my friend and her children.  I don't understand why I'm having such a hard time now.

I am grateful for God and the strength he gives me each day.