Weekend Update:

Friday:
Ended the work week by going to visit Dad.  Dwayne is back to deer camp so it was cereal for supper.  I could live on cereal.  When I got home, Lizzy called to see if she could come over.  We watched TV and then I fell asleep.  Poor Lizzy, she had to wait up for her Dad by herself.
Saturday:
I had to work half a day.  Didn't do much around the house in the afternoon.  Nathan came over that night to watch TV.
Sunday:
I woke up with my joints hurting so I didn't go to church.  I rested until late afternoon then went to Wal-Mart to buy groceries for Thanksgiving Dinner.
Monday:
I kind of had a rough day thinking about Mom.  That night I was getting ready to go to prayer meeting at Dad's house.  I got out my old Bible.  I open it up and out falls a card.  I open it and it's one Mom had given me years ago.  The first thing I saw was, Love, Mom.  I don't know if there is a heavenly connection to us her on earth or not, but I do know if was just what I needed.  It was as if Mom was saying, it's okay, you'll be alright.  Very comforting.
We didn't have too many at our prayer meeting.  Afterwards, Judy, Lizzy and Nathan came down and we worked on Thank You cards.  We're a little late on getting these done.

I'm grateful for my great niece, Lizzy and great nephew, Nathan for spending time with me.  I'm afraid they will "outgrow" me before long.

Weekend Update:

Friday:
Deer Season is tomorrow.  As if that's the most important thing in the world to my husband.  He frantically got all his stuff together to head to deer camp.  He deserves the vacation as he works so hard and has to drive two hours to work each day.
They all have fun at deer camp.  It's almost sacred ground.  I just don't get it.  Dwayne gets so excited to see deer along the highway.  I'm secretly thinking, yeah a deer, we just saw one last night too.  We have some deer that has been in our yard and staying on the hill above the house.  I do admit I like seeing them when I get home from work, but I'm not yelling about it.
Saturday:
I went to April's and we went to Jefferson City to do some shopping.  We got lost going to the furniture store but finally made it after many twists and turns. April ordered a new bedroom set.  I watched Cash while she was filling out paperwork and looking.  I thought Cash would run wild, but he was really good.  He was fascianated with all the furniture and decorations.  We then went to the Mall to shop.  We ate at a Japanese restaurant.  It was really good.  Cash even liked it.  A couple more stops and we were ready to head home.  I stayed at April's for awhile to visit.  I'm not the best night driver but I know the road going to St. Elizabeth pretty good and don't have a problem.
Sunday:
I went to church and then to Dad's for a visit.  He really seems to be doing good.  I left and went to Rolla for a little Christmas shopping and then the dreaded grocery shopping.  On home to an evening of watching TV by myself.
Monday:
Typical work day.
When Mom passed away, my nephew, Wayne want the family to start a prayer meeting group on Monday nights.  It starts at six.  I didn't go as Dwayne doesn't get home until about 5:45 and not always having supper ready I would have been too late.  Judy called me around 6 o'clock Monday evening and asked if I was coming.  I told her no, I still needed to eat and clean the kitchen.  After I got off the phone, Dwayne asked why I wasn't going.  I told him I still had too much to do.  He kindly offered to clean the kitchen for me.  I went to the meeting.  It went good.  I kind of have mixed feelings about it and I don't know why.

I am grateful for the times spent with family.

Weekly Visit:

Our weekly visit turned out to be an all day event.  April's babysitter was off for Veteran's Day.  Dwayne was also off, so we got to babysit.  

Dwayne and April used to have "chip n dip" breaks after the boys went to bed.  She was Cash's age.  As soon as the boys were asleep, she would want Thunder Cats on while her and Daddy have their chip n dip breaks.  She looked forward to this every night.

Now Cash is following in his Momma's footsteps as him and Grandpa enjoyed their break together.

April fixed lasagna the other night for Mike's birthday.  Cash helped her and enjoyed eating ahead of time.  Cute little helper

Mike's lasagna birthday cake.

I am grateful for Mike, April and Cash.

Blue Willow Dishes:

Dwayne inherited his Grandma Rea's blue willow dishes.  He doesn't like it when I use them.  Only on special occasions can I get them out.
Last night was a special occasion.  Who says you can't eat Taco Bell out of nice dishes.
Todd brought his friend, Michelle over for supper.  I didn't lay out any meat so Dwayne picked up the meal.
Although, we've know Michelle and her family for years, we hadn't spent much time together.  We had a pleasant evening visiting and watching TV.  Actually, Dwayne watched TV as the three of visited.  You can't miss an episode of NCIS! (which we watch two episodes per night.......)

I am grateful for heirlooms and a visit from Todd and Michelle.

Momma:

On Wednesday, October 28th, I went home that morning to take a shower and my medicine.
While at home, I posted about the passing process of dying
Later that day at 2:35 p.m. Momma passed away.  We were all with her except Russ.  He had gone on an errand to Rolla.  Kate and Judy held her hands, I held her foot and Dad was laying by her.  My Dad has expressed she didn't suffer.  I saw it differently as she struggled with each breath she took until the end.  I would like to think she didn't suffer.
As odd as this sounds, it was a blessing.  After watching her like this for five days, we were ready for her suffering to end and to go on to her heavenly home.  There were no tears, we were all probably just in shock.  Kate called Hospice and they came out and took care of calling the coroner and funeral home.
Katie and I turned Mom onto her back and then we washed her body.  They say God gives you extra strength to get through and I can attest to that.  I have lived in fear the past year for this time.  If only I had trusted God.
Strength, a strong word.  God gave me a strength I didn't know I had.  How could I have possibly washed my own mother's body?  How could I have cared for her and cleaned her up during the week?
How could I endure this pain without crying?  So many questions and I remember a wise woman (Mom) who has always told me we can do what we have to do.  She has been a great role model and her many words of wisdom comes to mind each day.
After Mom passed away, family started dropping by.  We reminisced about our times with Mom and different stories of events and favorite times.  It was a good healing time with our family.
Thursday, we went to the funeral home and made arrangements.  This also was an easier process than I imagined.  Mom had told me she wanted a white casket with pink flowers.  Her casket was beautiful.
 Judy wasn't feeling well from her chemo pills and went on home.  Kate and I went to Vienna to order flowers from The Flower Basket.  Angie did an excellent job with the casket spray using pinks and purple.  Katie picked out the pictures to use and I went on home to rest as I was exhausted.
Friday left a day of grieving and catching up on rest.  Visited with Dad.  That evening Dwayne and I went to Randy's Road Kill and then back to Dad's.  More visiting with family and feeling the close bond we have.
Saturday night was visitation.  I can't even begin to count the number of people that came through the line.  Wonderful tribute for Mom.  Once again that word strength came into play.  How can you stand there for  hours and not shed a tear?
Sunday was the funeral.  The pastor did a good job of portraying Mom's personality.  The only regret I have about the funeral was Mom's song wasn't sang or read.  Judy couldn't do it as she was sick.  But I so wish I had known it wasn't going to be included I would have gladly read it to the crowd.
Mom had been working on a song for her funeral.  She had been in and out of the hospital and nursing home for months.  She would come up with a verse and then Katie would right it down.
They did this over the course of the past few months.  The song is called, Me and Jesus Have This All Worked Out.
After the cemetery and still no tears the word strength came into my mind and you can do what you have to do.  I'm not saying it was easy, but there was a peace and strength in my soul.
We went back to Dad's for a dinner.  My good friends, Susan, Peggy, Pat and Bobbi set up the food and had everything ready.  Can you believe on November 1st, we were able to set up and eat in the yard?  The weather was great.
I have a message on my answering machine from Mom a few weeks ago.  I am trying to save it and I play it periodically just to  hear her voice.
I know the grief is going to hit me but for now I can honestly say, I'm doing fine.

I am so grateful to have had my wonderful mother in my life and the love of our whole family.

Celebration:

We celebrated Dad's birthday at my nephew, Tony's house with a fish fry.  It was a great afternoon of visiting and celebrating another year with Dad.

I am grateful to still have my Dad with us.

Dad's 91st Birthday:

Dad and Cash 2014.  Their shirts almost match.

So grateful to still have my Dad.